Friday, August 05, 2005

As long as she's got noise, she's fine

Currently listening to Dar Williams and wondering how a life of cubicle-dwelling and rent-paying can possibly be as worthwhile as that of a travelling musician. Sure, I don't have any talent or instruments, but the story would be great. Maybe I could travel the country entertaining people in grocery store lines, as I have a tendency to do already. Maybe I could pack up and leave on a 4 year trek to find myself - I'm not sure college did the job. I certainly never stumbled upon my inner child or adult, my inner drunkard for a while, but that's it. What if you never really find yourself? What if you just find what you're happy being? Kind of like the caveman diet, you coast until you feel the need to change.

My grandmother left a note on her refrigerator once when she went to the grocery store: "I've gone out to find myself. If you see me before I return, keep me here." I always thought this was remarkably hip of my grandmother, until I saw it on a magnet at some beach-y boardwalk crap store. I still think that my grandmother is remarkably hip, but this is no longer a good example. She can rock an embroidered cotton shirt from Penny's like no body else.

I think I'm definitely a "grass is greener on the other side" kinda gal. I couldn't wait to get out of college because working would be better. It is, but now I can't wait to pick up and travel around because that would be better. And then, I can't wait to do the next thing, cause that will be better. The next thing is always better, which is good, I guess - it keeps you moving.

This is a v. philosophical entry. I think it's because I'm doing tedious things at work today and my id is longing to break free. Or my super id, or ego. Maybe I'M just longing to break free. If I could go anywhere today, it would be to Zion National Park. I would take my bike and towel and my iPod with its everlasting battery. There'd be hiking, spot finding and sitting until the sun went down. Or maybe I'd go to the that little beach on Capri under the ferry pier where my glowy constalation watch met its ultimate demise. I'd like to go to Turkey, too. I hear South Africa is cool, so says Jock Itch Rachel (good job with the Lotramin, btw!) Iceland, Arles, Germany, Morocco, Gabon, Eritrea, Andorra, Cinque Terra, Hondorus, and so on and so on.

You don't know how precious you are, you don't know how much I adore you.

I think I miss the ability to express myself through Away message. The opportunity for passive aggressivity has certainly been taken down a few notches.

I had oatmeal with chocolate chips in it this morning. That can't possibly be a healthy breakfast. They were Trader Joe's all natural chocolate chips, but still. It was delicious.

Perhaps more later.

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