Wednesday, November 16, 2005

"Good for you"

- What Tad Hamilton, Hollywood movie star, says to innocent little Rosalie after she rejects his advances and tells him that she should be getting home rather than stay with him at his place prior to wedding, second date, or even second base.

I hate this. I hate it when boys act all superior and knowing after a girl makes the smart move and doesn't hook up with them. To stay with him would be against her better judgement, so she says "I/you should leave." AND HE TAKES CREDIT FOR THE GOOD DECISION/PRETENDS TO VALIDATE HER GOOD DECISION/MAKES BELIEVE THAT HE KNEW SEPARATION WOULD BE THE SMART AND IDEAL OPTION. He didn't!!! Oh, no, he got shut down. He was rejected. But with his "Good for you, xxxx" he becomes the all-knowing dominate male, still issuing validation and approval on a woman who JUST REJECTED HIM.

I'm sorry, I have experience with this. How dare you undercut the power that I showed by making the mature, adult choice by telling me that it's ok??? I don't need your approval, I already got it when you invited yourself into my pants. Your only job now is to be hurt. To be hurt and realize that I am better than you.

Were you trying to take advantage of me with the initial advances, is that why you were so impressed when I rebuffed them? Did you think that I was some weak-willed, easily controlled little girl who you could have your way with? Surprised that it wasn't as easy as you thought?

WELL DON'T MAKE YOURSELF FEEL ANY BETTER BY CLAIMING MY VICTORY. I TURNED YOU DOWN, I SHOWED SOME COURAGE, I MADE THE SMART DECISION, IT WAS ME NOT YOU. YOUR ONLY ROLE IN THIS LITTLE SCENE WAS TO BE THE REJECTED ONE.

DON'T THINK YOU HAVE THE RIGHT TO STEAL MY THUNDER!!!!

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Is there any way for the guy to be shot down in a graceful manner? Like can he say, "I'm sorry, you're right, I'm an idiot..." ? Or does making a move constitute tacit acceptance of going down in flames?
Chris

that mckim girl said...

Lizzie, that was a great post, commenting on what we all know deep in our hearts is a very great movie.

do you really think your mom won't read your post? I don't know if I could resist. And it's not like it would be bad if she read it- you are talking about your tendency to take the 'moral' road with the male species.

And to Chris...whoever you are: I think that 'you're right, I'm sorry, I'm an idiot' is an excellent response.

Peace out, kids.

Lizzie said...

Dear Chris,

1. Do I know you? I hope I do because I like any boy who uses the word graceful, constitute, and tacit at once.

2. Courtney's right, "I'm sorry" is a perfectly appropriate and acceptable response. In fact, it's the only appropriate response.

3. To some guys (and girls) making a move does indicate the possibility of getting shot down. These people recognize their advances as leaving them vulnerable to rejection. To others, there's no possibility of rejection because they are assholes who will get what they want. This is when see nasty little deeds like assault, harassment, and condescention. Yeah, they got rejected, but they need to make it someone else's problem. But here's the thing, it doesn't matter which kind of person made the move, it's still up to that person to recognize and respect their partner's decision to stop. Respect, not hijack.

Well, that's just my opinion, but I'm inclined to think that I'm right.

Anonymous said...

Of course you know me! I lived down the hall from you! Okay, yes, I was the most reclusive suite-mate DMC ever saw, but I was there!
I'll keep the response in mind for the next time I get shot down. I'll consider it my metaphorical parachute. Broken legs, here I come!
But seriously, I hope more people start adopting this attitude. People who think that "no" means something other than "no with a vengeance" make it a nasty unpleasant world for everyone else.
Chris

Anonymous said...

Lizzie,

Your mama should read this. Even tho she already knows you're wonderful and smart and brilliant, it never hurts to see a little extra positive reenforcement that she was a good mother and brought you up right with good moral values and judgment. You both done good!

Prude