Wednesday, July 02, 2008

Tryin' to be an Interweb Hobo

I love hobos. Hobos like to live off the grid. They leave their jobs, permanent addresses, and tax burdens so as to live off the land and their wits. They break their ties and forge ahead into a world unfettered by their conformist pasts.

I'd like to hobo-cize my Internet presence. At the tender age of 25, I've got profiles and postings and random accounts a-plenty. Too many to count, in fact, and it freaks me out that each of those profiles is out there saying something about me when I'm not watching. True, it's all stuff that I wrote (or my publicist, Courtney No Last Name), but I can't remember what or where it all is. And it doesn't go away, and I don't know who's seeing it. Frankly, I feel a little dirty knowing all that is out there. So, I'd like to go off the grid a little - remove the unwanted profiles, purge the Interweb indiscretions of my youth (myspace account, I'm thinking of you here). I'd feel better and I'm sure there'd be some carbon offsetting benefit somewhere in there.

So I tried to take step one today - delete MySpace account. Eliminate the most pervasive example of frivolous internet presence. Purge the wasted energy beast. Except you can't delete your account without responding to an email sent to your email address of record, which happens to be my old McDaniel College account. Do I know the password to that account? No. Do I know the address to check it? No. Does it even still exist? Probably, and it's likely filled with campus-wide announcements about poster sales and Karaoke happy hours. But none of that helps me and my mission.

So, the jagged claws of the internet have won this battle, but I will persevere. I will take the hill and win the war. I will google this problem into the Stone Age, and I will begin the journey to selective hobo-ocity.

Feel free to check my Facebook page for updates...

If you're interested in further hobo learnin', here are some fun definitions from

Hobo -
1. A hobo, unlike a bum or a tramp, is more than willing to work, but mostly for a short duration, as their main impetus is travel, the love of the journey above the actual destination. A bum is stationary, feeding off of those unfortunate enough to cross his path; a hobo merely travels from town to town, finding work when he can, but only for the sake of financing his next adventure. NEVER call a hobo a bum...they'll kick your sorry no-bo ass!
2. A free man/woman who is no longer trapped in the society of capitalism and time. He/she can go to sleep whenever he/she wants to, and do anything.
Hobos are good at recycling dumpstered food that huge coporations throws out.
3. nothin beats the hobo life stabbin folks with my hobo knife
4. Hobos are a peaceful people.Being homeless and pennyless, similar to MC Hammer. They go place to place taking money from people for doing odd jobs, whether it be pulling weeds, kiiling roaches, cleaning roach poop, or eating roaches.

They're like uh...drifters. Telling stories to whoever they can